The times they are a changin

Well the local paper had a big story on the front page todayyesterday ,I guess
titled Li brary jobs, hours face cuts...and then went on to talk about how 48 positions are most likely going to be cut. There are 17 libraries in the county....so it will be spread out...but a smaller side column notes that the hardest hit libraries include Mims-Scotsmoor 51-32 hrs open, Martin Luther King 50 to 32, MELBOURNE BEACH 60 to 44 Palm Bay 54 to 40, South Mainland 54 to 40, and Merritt Island 64 to 51. We all knew this was coming...but now the reality is about to happen. Final decisions will be made and changes go into effect in October. One by one we are being taken aside and told what our individual status will be.....glad I'm not the boss......that's never an easy thing to do.
I have been told that I will remain...at the same rate and same # of hours........but instead of 16hrs in Children's and 4 at Circ desk...it will be the opposite. I will still get to do my Thursday Storytime...and I am really happy for that......and will fill in for Ms. Di as needed. That's probably part of the reason I still have a job.......I can do Circ, Reference and Children's.....not everyone is able/willing to do that. Do I like to do those other jobs as much........no. So I am giving myself a few days to sulkfeel sad about this....and then I am going to have to move on.
But I feel a bit like an Art teacher who has been told...you still get to teach...just not Art....if that helps you to understand how I feel. I know other people are LOSING their jobs...and I should be grateful...and I am...but it still makes me sad?unhappy? all of the above? Another little kink in this whole plan is that the staff will be cut as of Sept. 30?/ (last pay period) but the number of hours the libraries will be open doesn't change until the 15th or so of October......so everyone is going to be scrambling. to cover all the hours with reduced staff.....and what really makes me sad is that happens to be when we had a little trip planned to go up to join my sister Martha( & Tony) at Amelia Island while they are over from Hawaii. I put a request in 2 months ago...and was told it was too early to know what was going to happen.....now I know why. The thing is I get to see my sister 2 times a year...we try to go skiing in the winter/spring...and she usually makes a point to get over to the mainland at least one other time. I don't know if I will be able to deal with it if I am turned down for the time off....and I just really don't want to think about that option right now.
Last night I was feeling a bit overwhelmed.......I have realized in the last couple of years at work...new director...lots of changes....that I am not as open to change as I thought I was. I am pretty easy going.. but I had a nice little routine going and I liked my job. Slowly it seemed like things I felt were important weren't what other people thought were important.....like my Outreach programs. To see the kids who don't get to come into the Library regularly get excited about me coming to read to them...and then telling their parents that they Want to go to the Library...is exciting to me. That's what my job is all about!....and I guess that's what's most frustrating to me.......losing the opportunity to do things like that. SO...I was a little downhearted last night and John could tell....and he surprised me this morning with a card in my bag.....
"What a wonderful world it would be....if everyone were as nice as you. Thank you"
He wrote that I was one of a kind and that even if things aren't always the way we WANT them to be...we can still be positive about change and make it make US more positive. (along with some other nice things)
Anyway...I felt like I was in a Hallmark commercial....I teared up and everything...and it did make me feel better and it was very thoughtful......
I'm still worried about changes that are coming....different hours/days/tasks....and the fact that Tuesday morning when I am at the desk...I am watching the clock to see when I can go back to the other office......and it's sad that I won't be able to do that anymore ......so I am hoping when I work at circ ALL the time...the little things that throw me off now....won't be so intimidating when I do them all the time...not just once every few weeks. So I will be writing about this....bear with me. Wish me luck!