The director of the library and the YS Librarian have had an uneasy relationship ever since she came on board 8-9 years ago.
I came back to MBPL in 2005, to work as a part time assistant to the YS Librarian. We had a good partnership, but I always felt that it was her program. I gave input, we worked together on several projects...but I wasn't the one making the final decisions. From time to time my supervisor would ask if there was anything I thought we "needed/wanted"...but don't remember too many times when we actually GOT something I had suggested. Ultimately...if I wanted something...a book, a music CD, a CD player, a special craft...I just bought it myself. From time to time I would have a little party or treat for the kids and again I just got it myself. Over time my position evolved
*working at the Circ desk is basically working in Customer Service. I enjoy chatting with patrons about movies and books, etc...but collecting fines from grouchy patrons isn't really too much fun. So I have to chuckle when people (lots of them) say..."Oh I've always thought it would be so great to work at a library"...like it's this nice, quiet happy place full of happy people sitting around reading books. 😀. hahaha A lot of them are...., the majority really...but it's not quite what people imagine it to be. One reason I always enjoyed working in the children's department is that it was fun and you did get to to know the parents and the children and watch them grow and learn. The front desk.....not as much.
Because D and I had worked together for 12 years we kind of knew what to expect from one another. I was lucky in that she let me do the Storytime program. At most libraries, that is a job that the head YS librarian usually does. I didn't get the crowds that she did (she had programs 3 days a week fo years, and the moms loved her) but I had my loyal followers and I think the parents and kids liked what I was doing. More than once I was asked if I had ever been a Pre-school teacher (usually by former pre-school teachers) so I took that as a compliment. Well in February this year after building tension on both sides (hers and the directors)...D finally decided she had had enough. She retired
.*I think that day she arrived to work and hadn't even made it halfway down the entrance hallway before she was pounced on for one thing or another....she told me she was done. Who really wants to go to work every day only to be made to feel like you're not doing anything right. It gets old FAST!!!!!
I was happy for D to be getting a break from the negativity...but also realized that most likely my time in YS was coming to an end. I did not want the full-time position.(..and quite honestly doubt I would have gotten it) but I heard that we (our library) were adding a part-time position. ...so there was a chance that I might get to stick around a bit longer.
WELL...it things went downhill from there. The director NEVER said ONE WORD to me about what was going on. Nothing about what she was thinking, planning...NOTHING. I continued to plan my programs for the time being.
All of the sudden one week- different people showed up to fill in for D's programs. I was never asked if I wanted to work extra hours to cover programs...no we brought in people from Titusville, Palm Bay and who knows where. She also never asked anyone (Me or D) what kind of program D had been doing. As a result...the subs came in prepared with crafts and stories for 3-5 year old...when the programs they were covering were for babies and toddlers. The parents weren't too thrilled and the subs were completely caught off guard. After a week or two, some of the parents suggested they might want to adapt a little and come prepared for the younger group. as for my program...a sub showed up (with no notice to me) and at least she just "observed" and assisted...she didn't come to do my program. All this was going on and still no word from the director. I was afraid to ask and stir things up...but I did email the director to ask what exactly was going on because a number of parents were asking me questions and I had no idea what to tell them. She NEVER responded. I got to keep doing my program for the next 3 weeks...and then one day I noticed a sign on the front window announcing to the public that there would be NO Programs the following week. And so...after 12 years....that's how I found out I was done. No chance to have a final program with the group...no notice, no information. The next week my immediate supervisor still had me on the schedule for my ST program so I was there, parents and kids arrived for the usual program....but I was not allowed to do anything and none of us got any explanation. It was frustrating for them and humiliating for me. The whole thing was so poorly handled...it still makes me angry. (I did get in touch with her supervisor just to let them know how I felt)
Let's just say March was not a lot of fun for me. A new YS person was hired and she seems great. She has a lot of fun ideas and has done a lot of fun programs already. I'll admit it's hard to see her doing programs that I had suggested we try, only to be told we didn't have $$ for that or some other reason why it couldn't be done. Now I don' know if D was the one who didn't want to do the programs, if she was told we couldn't do them...or really what to think. Right now money seems to be no object...so either the Friends have gotten more generous...or the new person is spending a lot of her own money. But that's not the worst part of the whole mess.
After I asked about the new position that was being added and got no response.....one day the director came out and made sort of a blanket announcement about a new position with emphasis on the fact that it would include filling in at Reference. (something she knows I don't really like to do...mainly because their are others more qualified than I, that DO like to fill in and get the extra hours...but that's another story) NO other information...no details,...nothing.
That was in March. I finally got an interview at the end of May.
I know I feel like this is whining...but if you've hung in there this long...I guess you'll keep reading...hhaha During the time that the decision was being made...another girl who had also applied was over in the YS department all the time helping with the Easter Egg Hunt, the Tea Party, the dog programs, cutting things out, etc. *I was taken to task for cutting out things for crafts when I was at the Circ desk...but this girl seemed to have a free pass on all things YS. I did get to help with the Egg Hunt... I believe it was put to me like this "I don't know if you're interested, but if you'd like, Danette could use some help with her Egg Hunt." GEEE why would I be interested??? I've only been working over there for 12 Years!!!! The kids who would be coming were kids who had been coming to my programs....such bull@$#@. So yes I'm whining!
Well...guess who got the job? I'm sure she'll do a fine job. Ultimately...the parents won't care as long as someone is there....but it sure has made me feel totally insignificant. Right now I feel really sad...I'm trying not to be resentful towards the girl who got the job....but the fact is she has worked for the library for just over a year as a page (shelver). (She has her AA degree...both of those are requirements f or that position.) I suspect part of the reason for the delay in filling the position was to wait until she "qualified". I'm sure when it comes to computers etc she is much more comfortable and qualified than I am...but as of this point we have never done anything technology related in our programs.The library owns a digital projector that none of us have ever seen...let alone been allowed to use. hahaha The director claims she wants to move away from what we've been doing....OK in 12 years she only ever came in ONCE to see what I was doing...so how does she know what she's changing. 😖
Bottom line is she doesn't...she just wanted D and I out...I think she's been waiting to do that since she came on board.
So....now I am working on my plan B...I wasn't planning to retire for a few more years, but I don't know if I want to be there and NOT be doing what I really want to do and see someone else getting to do it. I don't want to feel like crap every day and I don't want to have a bad attitude. I know no one "owes" me anything. I'm not saying I deserve anything special...but I sure wish I had gotten a little more respect. I have been there a long time and I have always done my best to work as a team and do a good job and I'd like to think I deserved a little better treatment than I got.
Welll...enough I'm trying to get past this and move forward. I have a few ideas so we'll see what happens.
And...don't worry my next post is going to be about a great celebration we just had for my nephew...I'm gathering photos and I'll be back to report on that soon.
