Dispirited

Dispirited-Affected or marked by low spirits, dejected
And that folks is how I have been feeling since yesterday. Let me explain (and with any luck get it off my chest so I can feel better). For the last month or so I have been trying to plan a reunion with John's family.
My family tries to get together once or twice a year or whenever we can. Someone has a plan... or  they're going to be in __________ city for whatever reason...and the rest of us try to figure out if there's any way we can get there at the same time. We don't ALL always make it...but we've done pretty well over the years. One summer it was Cherry Creek, Co. David was in the art show...Mark was working out there, it's an easy trip from Hawaii...etc. We've met up in DC, in Fl...you get the idea.
With John's family it's been a little harder. When his parents were alive...we usually all tried to get together at Thanksgiving. We would either drive up to Alabama or Tennessee...or once to celebrate a milestone birthday for Grace...my sister-in-law planned for us all to meet up at Callaway Gardens. Now that Grace and John are gone...we have not been as good about getting together. It's sad. (to me...apparently not to everyone else...but I'll get to that).
So...I decided it was high time we had a reunion. Last year Megan got married...all my brothers and sisters made it...we missed a few of my nieces, nephews and bothers-in-law...later on in August we all got together again for my nephew's wedding...a couple of my brothers couldn't make it...but as it turned out everyone we had missed at Megan's wedding...made it  to Ian's; so  all in all...it worked out. It took some planning but it was worth the effort.
 Unfortunately not all of John's family could get there. Some couldn't make it and to be honest, some weren't on the guest list because of space and financial limitations. All the more reason to try again.
 From the start John told me I was setting myself up for disappointment. "Who cares! I will do it anyway!"
Well...a few people jumped on board immediately...and others sounded enthusiastic. I asked if there was a time or place that would be better...seems like the general consensus was that October was a good month. Okay...making progress.
 We made a few suggestions as to where we should go..No one really responded ...so Brenna took charge and said "Okay...we are going to Disney's Fort Wilderness Resort. a place with lots of fun things to do and a wide range of places to stay at all price levels. We made a reservation...with the understanding that we could cancel if we needed to....and we waited. As I said...a few jumped in right away...made reservations. Meanwhile the others were being a little vague. I understand people are busy...it's not always easy...but surely with 5-6 months notice you can make some sort of plan. as I told some of them, a friend of mine from a large Catholic family told me years ago "You reach a point in life where there are a lot of celebrations and a lot of funerals. People seem to drop everything for the funerals...but I find the celebrations to be a LOT more fun. I go to as many as possible" (that's not an exact quote...but you get the idea). I am reluctant myself sometimes...it drives John crazy...hahah but what I told everyone is...I understand if it doesn't work out...but all I'm asking is that you think about it and not be too quick to say "I can't do that"
My reason for wanting to do this is that we have not seen some of these family members in 5-6-7 years. We have watched some of them grow up through pictures on Facebook...which is better than nothing I guess...but it's not good enough for me. It just seems like a shame to let all this time go by...because when I think about the last 5-6-7 years in my life there are more people than I'd like to remember that are no longer here....And as time goes on and we all get older the reality is...we are going to lose some more. Don't get me wrong...as far as I know...no one is on the verge of death...but as we all know...things happen.
So imagine how I felt yesterday morning when I looked on Facebook and saw the smiling faces of a number of these same relatives who haven't committed ...enjoying their vacation at Disney World. Not one of them ever mentioned they would be there this week. (maybe they would have preferred a different spot to meet in October ...if we had known they were going to be in Orlando in March).
I am glad they are all having fun...but I cannot tell you how disappointed? discouraged? disheartened? choose a word..I was. I don't want to crash anyone's vacation...but we haven't seen them in  over 5 years...they know we ( Okay- I ) are trying to get together...and yet no one thought to mention they were going to be an hour away this week? I just don't get it. It  actually made me cry to think that they were so thoughtless...and I use that word because I hope that they just didn't think about it...not that they deliberately left us out. It wasn't just me that was upset...Brenna, Megan and especially John were also upset. John told me -I warned you that you were setting your self up for disappointment and you didn't want to believe me. I knew this was not a good idea..and now I'm just mad. (or something like that).
Again...I wouldn't want to disrupt anyone's vacation plans...but really???? you don't even have time to meet your family somewhere...here? there? in the middle for lunch? or dinner? An hour or two of your time...that's what baffles me.
Well...I have that off my chest...I feel a little better. I'm still planning the reunion and I don't care who comes...the ones who have already said yes are excited and WE will have a good time reconnecting and getting to know each other...because we are family after all. If the others can't make the time or don't want to be bothered...I can't change that...but it does make me sad.
*They might feel a little guilty when they get home and a letter I  sent out just last week explaining why I was hoping they would try to come is there waiting.

**So I found out the group was in town just for two days...then left today to go back home. It's nice to know they weren't here for a week...but it still bothers me that no one said anything. I feel better after I wrote this...but still don't get it.