Trying to look on the bright side

I am generally a happy person. I try to stay positive, smile and enjoy life. But.....sometimes, for a variety of  reasons, that's hard to do. Life had been going along just fine for quite some time now, and then things at work started being shaken up a little. Change is inevitable and and even though I knew it was coming...it's NO FUN. (insert more colorful language here 😉 )
The director of the library and the YS Librarian have had an uneasy relationship ever since she came on board 8-9 years ago.
 I came back to MBPL in 2005, to work as a part time assistant to the YS Librarian. We had a good partnership, but I always felt that it was her program. I gave input, we worked together on several projects...but I wasn't the one making the final decisions. From time to time my supervisor would ask if there was anything I thought we "needed/wanted"...but don't remember too many times when we actually GOT something I had suggested. Ultimately...if I wanted something...a book, a music CD, a CD player, a special craft...I just bought it myself. From time to time I would have a little party or treat for the kids and again I just got it myself. Over time my position evolved more like eroded and I got less and less time over in YS and more time at the Circulation Desk.
*working at the Circ desk is basically working in Customer Service. I enjoy chatting with patrons about movies and books, etc...but collecting fines from grouchy  patrons isn't really too much fun. So I have to chuckle when people (lots of them) say..."Oh I've always thought it would be so great to work at a library"...like it's this nice, quiet happy place full of happy people sitting around reading books. 😀. hahaha A lot of them are...., the majority really...but it's not quite what people imagine it to be. One reason I always enjoyed working in the children's department is that it was fun and you did get to to know the parents and the children and watch them grow and learn. The front desk.....not as much.
Because D and I had worked together for 12 years we kind of knew what to expect from one another. I was lucky in that she let me do the Storytime program. At most libraries, that is a job that the head YS librarian usually does. I didn't get the crowds that she did (she had programs 3 days a week fo years, and the moms loved her) but I had my loyal followers and I think the parents and kids liked what I was doing. More than once I was asked if I had ever been a Pre-school teacher (usually by former pre-school teachers) so I took that as a compliment. Well in February this year after building tension on both sides (hers and the directors)...D finally decided she had had enough. She retired
.*I think that day she arrived to work and hadn't even made it  halfway down the entrance hallway before she was pounced on for one thing or another....she told me she was done. Who really wants to go to work every day only to be made to feel like you're not doing anything right. It gets old FAST!!!!!
I was happy for D to be getting a break from the negativity...but also realized that most likely my time in YS was coming to an end. I did not want the full-time position.(..and quite honestly doubt I would have gotten it) but I heard that we (our library) were adding a part-time position. ...so there was a chance that I might get to stick around a bit longer.
WELL...it things went downhill from there. The director NEVER said ONE WORD to me about what was going on. Nothing about what she was thinking, planning...NOTHING. I continued to plan my programs for the time being.
All of the sudden one week- different people showed up to fill in for D's programs. I was never asked if I wanted to work extra hours to cover programs...no we brought in people from Titusville, Palm Bay and who knows where. She also never asked anyone (Me or D) what kind of program D had been doing. As a result...the subs came in prepared with crafts and stories for 3-5 year old...when the programs they were covering were for babies and toddlers. The parents weren't too thrilled and the subs were completely caught off guard. After a week or two, some of the parents suggested they might want to adapt a little and come prepared for the younger group. as for my program...a sub showed up (with no notice to me) and at least she just "observed" and assisted...she didn't come to do my program. All this was going on and still no word from the director. I was afraid to ask and stir things up...but I did email the director to ask what exactly was going on because a number of parents were asking me questions and I had no idea what to tell them. She NEVER responded. I got to keep doing my program for the next 3 weeks...and then one day I noticed a sign on the front window announcing to the public that there would be NO Programs the following week. And so...after 12 years....that's how I found out I was done. No chance to have a final program with the group...no notice, no information. The next week my immediate supervisor still had me on the schedule for my ST program so I was there, parents and kids arrived for the  usual program....but I was not allowed to do anything and none of us got any explanation. It was frustrating for them and humiliating for me. The whole thing was so poorly handled...it still makes me angry. (I did get in touch with her supervisor just to let them know how I felt)
Let's just say March was not a lot of fun for me. A new YS person was hired and she seems great. She has a lot of fun ideas and has done a lot of fun programs already.  I'll admit it's hard to see her doing programs that I had suggested we try, only to be told we didn't have $$ for that or some other reason why it couldn't be done. Now I don' know if D was the one who didn't want to do the programs, if she was told we couldn't do them...or really what to think. Right now money seems to be no object...so either the Friends have gotten more generous...or the new person is spending a lot of her own money. But that's not the worst part of the whole mess.
After I asked about the new position that was being added and got no response.....one day the director came out and made sort of a blanket announcement about a new position with emphasis on the fact that it would include filling in at Reference. (something she knows I don't really like to do...mainly because their are others more qualified than I, that DO like to fill in and get  the extra hours...but that's another story) NO other information...no details,...nothing.
That was in March. I finally got an interview at the end of May.
I know I feel like this is whining...but if you've hung in there this long...I guess you'll keep reading...hhaha During the time that the decision was being made...another girl who had also applied was over in the YS department all the time helping with the Easter Egg Hunt, the Tea Party, the dog programs, cutting things out, etc. *I was taken to task for cutting out things for crafts when I was at the Circ desk...but this girl seemed to have a free pass on all things YS. I did get to help with the Egg Hunt... I believe it was put to me like this "I don't know if you're interested, but if you'd like, Danette could use some help with her Egg Hunt." GEEE why would I be interested??? I've only been working over there for 12 Years!!!! The kids who would be coming were kids who had been coming to my programs....such bull@$#@.  So yes I'm whining!
Well...guess who got the job? I'm sure she'll do a fine job. Ultimately...the parents won't care as long as someone is there....but it sure has made me feel totally insignificant. Right now I feel really sad...I'm trying not to be resentful towards the girl who got the job....but the fact is she has worked for the library for just over a year as a page (shelver). (She has her AA degree...both of those are requirements f or that position.) I suspect part of the reason for the delay in filling the position was to wait until she "qualified". I'm sure when it comes to computers etc she is much more comfortable and qualified than I am...but as of this point we have never done anything technology related in our programs.The library owns a digital projector that none of us have ever seen...let alone been allowed to use. hahaha The director claims she wants to move away from what we've been doing....OK in 12 years she only ever came in ONCE to see what I was doing...so how does she know what she's changing. 😖
Bottom line is she doesn't...she just wanted D and I out...I think she's been waiting to do that since she came on board.
So....now I am working on my plan B...I wasn't planning to retire for a few more years, but I don't know if I want to be there and NOT be doing what I really want to do and see someone else getting to do it. I don't want to feel like crap every day and I don't want to have a bad attitude. I know no one "owes" me anything. I'm not saying I deserve anything special...but I sure wish I had gotten a little more respect.  I have been there a long time and I have always done my best to work as a team and do a good job and I'd like to think I deserved a little better treatment than I got.
Welll...enough I'm trying to get past this and move forward. I have a few ideas so we'll see what happens. and I have to admit some of them involve finding just the right time to do like the song says "Take this job and shove it" :)
And...don't worry my next post is going to be about a great celebration we just had for my nephew...I'm gathering photos and I'll be back to report on that soon.

And The winner Was.....

Not my horse! Oh well! We had fun anyway. Actually I didn't know a thing about any of the horses...absolutely nothing, so I didn't really care. My horse did come in third place...had I made an actual bet, I would have won a few dollars....but I got nothing. well...I did get a new hat out of the day. Some friends were having a Kentucky Derby

  party at the local hangout, and we were invited. They were all wearing their Derby Day gear...and I wasn't sure what I was going to wear...since Brenna has the hats around here. However, we went down to Melbourne Beach Founder's Day celebration earlier in the day

and there just happened to be a lady selling hats! And we found one that matched my dress and fit my (little) head.

So that was nice. We didn't hang around too long in MB.We just walked out on the newly reopened pier.It had been damaged in the hurricane last summer, and just re-opened....and then we did a loop around the park so see who was around. The whole town usually is there at some point or another....we saw a few friends, but the party crowd wasn't there yet...hahaha. Meanwhile back at LD's the whole usual crew was there. We had some fresh fish that the guys fried up for everyone and other assorted snacks. One guy bought a couple of "sqaures" in the pool and then gave them to the girls who were working. Our waitress took hers and then her horse WON! She was happy and then said"Do I win anything?" not realizing that the winning ticket was worth $$$!

 When she found out she won money she was really happy! That was fun! That was almost a good as winning myself.
Now speaking of winners...I DID win something else recently. The Melbourne Area Panhellenic group was selling raffle tickets for a fundraiser. The prize was a cruise for two from Port Canaveral and Brenna was selling tickets, so we bought a couple. One for John, one for Me. And I won! he poor lady called Brenna first to tell her she had sold the winning ticket...and the winner was her mother (me)! Brenna was on a last minute trip to Rochester, NY and had left at 6am. She had just gotten back to her hotel and saw a face time call coming through. She thought her friend's young  son was calling her by mistake, so she called back to check. They told her about the winning ticket and she tried to muster some enthusiasm...hahaha. Meanwhile they had sent me an email...that I didn't read for two days. Oh dear..hardly the response they had hoped for I'm sure. It was exciting to win the cruise (or money towards a cruise) and two bottles of champagne in cute decorated bottle holders. 

The prize is valued at $750.00 plus the champagne...so that's not too shabby. :)

Good Times in April

 hand...sometimes I get to a point like now where I have too much to write about and not enough motivation to start. That said... I'm going to do my best to give a rundown on April's fun events.
The month started off with a bang when we helped surprise our friend Al on his 50th birthday.

His actual birthday was in March, and he had taken a week long  fishing vacation with some good friends...so he was not expecting anything two weeks later. Somehow his girlfriend managed to keep it a secret...in spite of the fact that everyone who regularly goes to Longdoggers, runs with Al, etc knew about it. Their biggest challenge was convincing him to go out to dinner downtown the night of the surprise party. His mother and his sister were in town for the weekend , but  they  had all started working on him a week or two ahead of time...knowing it would take some time to get him to agree to go out. Someone came up with a convincing argument and they had part two of the plan in place.
While they were a few blocks farther down the street having dinner...all his friends were gathering at a local spot-The Iron Oak Post-

 that was reserved for his party. Decorations were up,

video cued up, DJ ready to go and more and more people arriving every minute. We got word around 8pm that they were having a time trying to get him to "stop for a drink" on the way home. He could not understand why they needed to stop when they could just go home and enjoy a good drink on the pool deck and try out the new fire pit at home!!!! Finally one of them said "we're going!' and he relented.
Meanwhile back at the Iron Oak bar  we were ready. Mary G. had brought a bag full of choir robes from her kids' school...for the group of guys affectionately known as "The Choir Boys".., a name Al gave them years ago.

We dimmed the lights and when they walked in naturally we all yelled "SURPRISE!" Then Mark W. one of the boys...started singing "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow!". It was a special moment. Al immediately got choked up. He was so surprised and overcome by all the people that were there to celebrate him...he was speechless...but only for a moment...hahaha! He found the mike soon enough as usual

We had a great time dancing, talking to everyone and just enjoying the great celebration. As for Al...he told everyone that it was one of the best moments of his life.

business partners...LJ and Scotty

Later that month we celebrated Easter morning with sunrise mass at the beach, followed by brunch with family and friends at the Hogg's house.
These people have been family friends for over 40 years and it's always a pleasure to be around them. As the years go by, many of the older generation have passed away , moved away, or for one reason or another are  no longer able to attend...but there are always enough to continue the tradition. Mr. Hogg has not been in great health, and just celebrated his 82nd birthday...but he more than anyone was determined that the party was going to go on! There's a comfort in being around people that have known you since you were a teenager (or younger) and have been through all the ups and downs that life brings. We've all been through the struggles and celebrations...and and one way or another...we are still making it. I also heard a few stories about my parents that I don't remember ever having heard before...as well as the stories of the crazy costume parties they participated in back when we were the kids...hahaha Hearing one of my parents old friends telling me how much she respected my Dad for his intelligence and his unstoppable wit...was fun. she also told me about how they had all been through trial and tribulations...themselves, or their children or both...and how through it all they all managed to hang in there. But...she pointed out that my mother, and another great friend Joan M., were the "go to" people when someone needed a good friend to hear them out, help them out, figure out to go forward during a difficult time. For me that was such a compliment...I knew my mother was always a good friend...but had never heard that from this particular person. As Mrs. T said "Your mother had her own problems, as we all did...but I can't tell you how much she meant to all of us. How much she helped us when we needed it"

the younger generation-some of us

The following week Brenna and I went to the Melbourne Art Festival at it's new location in Wickham Park. The weather was nice and I think we both agreed that it was a good spot for the show going forward. After years of being in Downtown Melbourne...there was a lot of resistance  when the move was announced. Some people vowed never to go again, etc...all in all...we both thought it was a nice spot with plenty of room for the artists, music, food booths, etc. *I still remember when we were disappointed that it was moving downtown after years of being held in Indialantic...but we survived the move...hahaha. and we will again.
Lastly  we had a visit from my sister Liz and her friend Jon. It was a quick 3 day visit...which she packed in as much as possible...hahaha. I always like having company...and enjoyed having breakfast ath the local spot with them and trying out a new place in Cocoa Beach.

We also had a fun cookout at our house thanks mostly to John who organized everything, set the table, called everyone and caught fish! I had to work until 5:15...so I wavered when he brought up the idea...but between him and Liz and Jon...it was all ready to go when I got home. David, Mark, Paul and Tracy, as well as Brenna and Josh joined us. At the last minute...some friends of Jon's daughter (in Virginia) who just happen to live in Palm Bay currently also joined us. The weather was great, the fresh fish was great and the company was even better. Good times! Glad John persisted!!

Party recap

It's almost the end of March.....so I guess it's  about time I shared pictures and stories from "60's Party the Sequel"
While I did not spend quite as much time planning ahead on this one 😏 If you know me, you know I was working on it. Hahaha One thing different about this year's party was that it seemed like everyone else was excited and talking early on.... I guess I hyped it up enough last year that this go round there was already built in hype....that was a plus. The people who seemed to be the most excited were the ones who came last year, but for whatever reason , including for some, a late invitation, didn't really get into the whole costume part of the party. This time...they were all in...and had fun talking about and planning this year's plan. That was one of the best parts for me, seeing other people get as excited as I was and having as much fun getting ready for the party, as they did actually attending the party!😊
I was  a little reluctant at first to have a party with the same theme...sequels never seem to turn out as well as the first event...but so many people said "we have to do this again"....that I had to agree. Haha (it's not hard to convince me to have a party hahaha) Also...the fact that we already had all the decorations, plenty of plates, flatware and cups to use and a ready to go playlist...it made sense. Of course...since this was MY party hahah, I got to tweak the playlist 🎵🎶 a little so it was more suited to my taste. I took a few songs out that John had requested, and added several new songs that I preferred...so that was nice  :) I bought a few more things to use as decorations and as a result I still enjoyed the preparations.

Porcupine Cheese Ball-just like in The Astronaut Wive's Club

We opted to wait until after the holidays to have this year's party. Last year the calendar kind of worked out perfectly for the January 2nd date...but this time we decided to wait until late in January, giving everyone a little time in between the Christmas and New Year's holidays and our party.
I was  a little nervous about how many people would be coming...since last year we had over 100 people at our house and we were pretty much a full house. Because everyone was talking about it, I was thinking we might even get more this year.
 As it turned out...right off the bat we had about 20 fewer people, because a lot of my family was not going to be able to make it. Ellen, Erik and Anna made plans to come from New York, but for  the rest of the gang from out of state  this year's party was not going to fit it into their schedules.

 We had about 15 people to ADD to the list...so , so far, so good. In the end I worried for nothing, because we ended up with about 35-40 fewer people total. It made it much easier to get around the house...that's for sure! Plenty of room for dancing and getting from room to room.

plenty of great food!

 I didn't have my family to dance with...hahaha but we had some people that danced all night, so I was happy.

Dancing with Spock and rookie Bob G

 We had fun! One girl had a tambourine as part of her costume, and we had fun passing it around. Almost everyone who was dancing had it at one point or another.
There were a lot of great costumes...almost everyone got into the spirit of things!

Gogo girls, Spock and Jackie Kennedy

Hugh and Bridget

when these two walked in someone asked "What are they? Viet Cong?" (nope just to castaways from Gilligan's Island) hahahaha and they had NO idea what I was talking about when they asked me to guess what they were supposed to be and I laughed and said someone thought they might be VC.

a little more room to get around this year

Jeannie and Major Nelson stopped by

a bunny, a hippie, Lilly P and me

a 60's Dad, an pilot/astronaut, a nighclub singer and James Dean????

Jackie and a hippie

"Carnac the Magnificent"

So...the sequel was fun...not as big as the original...but a fun time was had by all. LOTS of dancing, lots of food and beer, plenty of wine, a little bit of pingpong, and plenty of laughs.Now we are going to have to wait for someone else to turn 60, so we can get everything back out again sometime..Or...try to come up with the next party idea.......maybe a Halloween party???????